I always come back from my camp week with my head full of too many ideas to capture easily on paper. One of the ideas that has been rattling around in there for about 6 months to a year is the idea of me trying to fit all the puzzle pieces of my life together.
In my life right now I have all these little worlds that seem completely unconnected with each other, and yet they are all an important part of my life. I have been talking to my husband and a few close friends about how I've been trying to make sense of how all these different worlds connect within me - wife, mother, friend, prayer group friend, church member - plus a few roles that defy definition. Because pondering is one of the things I do best, I've been pondering how on earth all these pieces fit together in a coherent whole (yes, these OCD tendencies do keep coming around to bite me on the butt).
So I've been telling people that I'm looking for my missing puzzle piece that will bring all these worlds together. (Overlooking the idea that there is no reason they should have to fit together.) Anyway, a friend who is a pastor (and the director of the camp I just got back from) finally gave me a word that fit this metaphor I've been pondering.
He came up with the idea to have the kids to a group project of a mosaic. Went and made a sturdy frame, got real ceramic tiles and mortar, drew up a picture and set them to work. He explained that he has come to believe that life (and our faith journey, and community) is not a puzzle, but a mosaic. In a puzzle, all the pieces fit together exactly, and only one piece fits any given space. In a mosaic, the pieces do not fit exactly, but all together, they do work.
I've been using the wrong metaphor all this time. If I look at all my little worlds, my roles, especially the ones defying definition, as a mosaic instead of a puzzle - suddenly I can see that they do all work together. I have to stop putting both God, and myself, in a box.
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